Well, God. Here we are.
One of those times when I feel completely alone, so You’re all I have.
Ironic of course because You’re ever all I have deep down beneath and through all else, but I’m easily distracted.
Spiritual ADD, I guess.
You know I love You. You know we have so much to work through.
Please help. And it would be really amazing if this time it didn’t have to hurt.
But I submit. Have it Your way, and take me with You kicking and screaming as usual if You must.
I guess I’m a little less angry with You; the more I realize how little I know myself I become less upset at how little I understand You.
All I want is You. But the real You. Not just Your guidance and Your voice. Not just Your promises in Your Word.
I want You.
I guess maybe that might be what I’m missing, that You truly are in all those things. But it seems like there’s more of You out there to be had.
Because, to be honest, if this is it, this sucks.
But it can’t be it. Too much testimony saying there’s more of You to be had.
They say You like to play hard to get. Please stop. I don’t have the right to ask that of You because You aren’t a tame Lion at my beck and call, but please…
Show me Your glory.
Your goodness.
Your love.
Rewrite the perceptions of my heart.
Until then, I will chase You.
And I will wait.